Sunday, July 18, 2010

A Bunch of Stuff

My nature has become the mind set to to let go. Not hold on to stuff. I crave to simplify. I don't keep all of my kiddos art projects, letters written, old outfits and special things. I failed at their baby books, scrap books and cataloging their growth. I used to write when I was a kid. I even collected memorabilia. Then one day everything was gone. My old pictures, yearbooks, journals, keepsakes were stolen. Since that day.. I think I was so heartbroken over "losing everything at 20" that I place little value into stuff. My husband on the other hand..saves everything. Our garage is filled with box after box of "stuff". He keeps everything from old batteries to the Dallas cheerleader cards from the 80's. I mean everything. Our garage is filled with "memories". This weekend we did an impromptu cleaning. Every few years I have my "wig-out"..A time where everything seems to fold in around me. My house needs painted, the carpet needs shampooed, my garage is so full I can't walk through it, our closets are overflowing, the weeds have taken over, our cars need new oil, my kids are screaming, the laundry is piling, what's for dinner, I have 5 printers (none work), another tree is dead on the property, Xia's hair needs to be done, there are boxes everywhere, my dining room looks like a junk yard, relationships are falling apart, my husband is giving me the ..I want sex look.. bills are unpaid, half the light bulbs are burnt out, the drawers are overflowing, tutoring needs to be done, we haven't left the house for days, I stink and need a shower, the twins skin looks ashy, oh crap..the water is going to be shut off in 3 days, I can feel crumbs in my bed....ARGH! I feel like everything is going to explode. It's all in ONE BIG ROOM! I can't take it!
Yep...that pretty much sums up my train of thought this weekend. For every box I put in the giveaway pile..Adam kept 5 boxes.
I know one day I will be thankful that men were created with the ability to compartmentalize. When I am 80..I will sit on my front porch and long for the days when I worried about dinner. I will want to look through all our stuff and remember the good ole days...OR...I will still be me-wanting to throw crap away and Adam will still be him..holding on to it all. Either way...it will be us. Together with my 1 box for his 15 boxes...just the way it was meant to be:) and I will still have my every couple of years wig out session when everything seems to be crashing down. He will hold me tight like he always does and we will sort through the stuff together:)

3 comments:

Paula said...

You know what I wish? I wish Columbia was a lot closer to Ashland.

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh this made me laugh. that is SO me and my hubby is the same way as yours.

Julie said...

My wig out sessions seem to be more "monthly" if you know what I mean and my husband is exactly the same. I have one box of memorobilia in the attic. He has about 20.

I feel weighted down by all the stuff we have and sometimes secretly long for a house fire to just come and consume it all (except the important stuff).

I purge as much as I can - the things in my domain but somehow I can only get the garage so clean without launching WWIII in our marriage :-)

We've talked about moving to Africa to do missions and he realizes it would all have to go at that point and seems okay with it. So why not now? I don't know but it makes me really want to move to Africa :-)