To Cut or Not to Cut

The Baby Einstein look

The Zoolander Look
Blue Steel

The mom will you PLEASE cut my hair look.

Blog Constipation

I know the title is gross! It's all that I could come up with that seems to fit my present state of mind. I have so much packed into my brain, that nothing wants to come out. Women or more honestly speaking, moi, me, myself and I the one typing, lives with everything in one big room. I lack the skill or am wired differently than my husband. Men or more honestly speaking, my husband, my man, my hero, my best friend has the ability to "compartmentalize" things. Example:(yes, a silly one but nontheless an example) I need to cook dinner, but wait I can't the kitchen's not clean, I must clean the kitchen first. My husband, I need to cook dinner, the kitchen's not clean- wait he would not even notice the kitchen's not clean. He would simply make dinner, that is the task at hand. Me? No. I notice the grime, oh yeah didn't I put in a load of laundry?, oh man I need to feed the dog, McKayley had an issue come up today that I need to talk to her about, Look at that zit growing on my chin, I didn't pray for so and so today, the van needs a bath, I have to call my mother in law back she's called 10 times already, I think I smell a poopy diaper, I wonder did anyone donate to Orphan Fund today, I need to send my Dossier this week, I didn't smile at the lady in the other car, How did the other moms perceive me today at the luncheon, why didn't I reach out to the girl on the corner that God put in my path?, my mom's best friend (my yet to come African kids), African American godmother is dying this week; I'm going to cry, she called me her white angel baby who God sent to help her people(heavy), haven't finished Christmas shopping, Oh yeah I haven't fulfilled my husbands love language in a few days, I'm running a fever, Wow, great news a family I met from this blog is picking up their 3 day old son (Praise God) Oh my gosh I forgot to mail Christmas cards!, it's been a year since we started the adoption journey, man, my face hurts from trying to wax the hair off my lip, have I called my mommajo lately? and the list goes on in MY BRAIN! In essence- all my thoughts are crammed into one big room and all I'm trying to do is make dinner! The funny thing is, tonight is no different from last night or what tomorrow will be. I'm not stressed or panicked, I am simply a woman serving her family, doing what God has called me to do and living in one big messy room. Did I make dinner? Of course!

More Snow!

We got more snow! I love it! I tried to upload the pictures but couldn't get it to work so they are on my Xanga site. www.xanga.com/bostermama

Strange Cravings

I have eaten a jar of jalapenos today. Had salsa and chips, and drenched my eggs in Hot sauce.
I am not pregnant, so what's up?

I Found the Cure!

One blog addict + one adorable baby = Cure for blog addictions.

I have not been purposefully neglecting my blog reading duties, just completely sidetracked. I had the privilege of taking care of the cutest baby boy the last few days. BLISS! The 2nd day was the best, I got to have one cutest baby ever, a super cool 2 year old boy and a beautiful 10 year old girl spend the day with me too. I loved every minute. I'm sooooo ready for more kids. Like NOW!

Okay, I have a slight confession, I still read everyone's blog- I just didn't have the time (to enamored with all the kids) to comment.

Sorry, I promise to get back on track with obsessively reading about your life.

Confessions of a Blog Addict.

I was originally going to title this post Xanga vs Blogger part 2. But I thought I might as well come clean. I'm a blog addict, I have a problem! I wake up and check everyone's blog, I check before I go anywhere, I check before bed and sometimes, Yes, I even wake up in the middle of the night and have to check out my favorite blogs. Pathetic, I know! So, why am I revealing my dark, embarrassing secret? It's Xanga's fault! I'm doing a comparison of the two (blogger and Xanga) over this next month, I want to find out which one is better. AnywayI discovered a tool in Xanga last night called Footprints. It is a tracker. I originally thought, "cool" I can see how many people read this thing. Oh No, it does way more than that, it tells you who is reading your blog. Cool right? No way! Not if you read people's blogs as often as I do. All this time, they (you) can see how really pathetic I am and how often I check their(your)site. I look like I'm stalking. So for all of you who see my name several times a day on your "footprints", really, I'm not a stalker! I never even knew blogs existed until I started this adoption adventure. I rarely got online. It's amazing how connected I've become to the internet now. I did my research on adoption agencies, countries, immigration laws, yahoo groups, blogs all online. I first saw Marion and Emmanuel's picture online. I fell in love with the kid from the foster system after seeing his picture online, I've met great friends, yes, online. I look forward to new posts from all of you, okay maybe a little too much. It's the one time or in my case multiple times a day that I'm not focused on what's going on in my life, or my adoption, or with my kids, but I'm truly listening with all my heart and praying with all that I have for your family, your adoption, and you. So, yes, I am a blog addict! And as far as Xanga vs Blogger- If you are not a blog addict, you might like the footprints thing to see who has visited you. Or if you're like me the whole footprints thing might make you feel like a dork. Either way, it's a cool feature!

I Guess it's Time for an Adoption Update

It has been an incredibly wild, heartbreaking and faith building year for me. We started our adoption journey last year about this time. In the 80's when the famine of Ethiopia happened I told myself one day I will do something no matter how small, So when we started the adoption journey, Ethiopia was the only choice for me. Then God changed my course and I ended up in Liberia. I had all my paperwork at an agency, then I found them! Marion a 8 month old girl and Emmanuel a 3 year old boy. I knew they were mine. I gave birth to them in my heart the moment I saw them. So, in a day, I started the paperwork all over again and had it sent to a different orphanage and agency. Before we could bring them home, Marion passed away and Emmanuel was returned to his village. My heart broke. But then God showed me what His will was. I saw two kids, He saw 100's. The orphanage they were at was incredibly poor the babies were with all the other kids. They were exposed to so many germs and they all got sick. Something needed to be done. So with God's help the funds were raised to build a baby home, with a clinic and it is being named Marion's House. God is good. So, I've been waiting for 6 months for a new referral, then I felt God leading me once again. This time to Uganda. I found an amazing organization there that helps so many people. So, I thought okay God, is this where my kids are? Again, NO! But instead through God's help he wanted me to help raise the funds for a project there to help 125+ people have a sustainable water source. I'm almost to my goal, about a thousand dollars left to raise. Again God is good! In the middle of all of this, we felt God leading us to a 12 year old child in the foster care system. So through obedience and faith we did even more paperwork, classes and etc.. We spent six months falling in love with him. He was going to move in at Christmas, but again God saw something else and he was to join a different family. Then a few days ago, I felt him leading me to Ethiopia. So here I am redoing my dossier all over again. Walking in faith. I don't know if my kids are there or not, but I'm listening to His call and following Him all over the place. I feel scared, and excited all at the same time to see what God has planned. I have grown and been stretched more than I thought was possible. Even through all the heartbreak, mountains of paperwork, tears, and fear, I wouldn't change any of it. I have met some amazing people that I feel blessed enough to call friends, I've built friendships that hopefully will last a life time,I started this blogging adventure, my eyes have opened to all the poverty, disease and inhumanity that exists in this world, I learned to look past the needs of my own family and in some small way reach out to help others. I am forever changed. God is Good.

How Steffany Got Her Groove Back.

He's home!!!!!!!! It was like Christmas in our house this morning. Adam got home around 3am and by 7am the kids were pouncing on us. "Daddy 's home, daddy's home!" so, by 8:00 am we had a fierce light sabre battle, a drum circle, and lots of hugs and kisses. His spirit and love brought the groove back to our family.

He's on the Plane

Wahoooo! 1st step complete: He's on the plane.

Sorry no dance yet!

Trying to Be Positive

Okay, I'm trying really hard to be positive. Adam was going to be home a few days ago, but was delayed with movie production challenges. He is scheduled to come home late tonight. However, it is snowing here and the person who was going to drive a couple of hours to the airport to pick him up, decided not to; I don't blame him a bit, the roads are nasty. I lost control and ended up on a sidewalk. To top it all off, he's not even at the Los Angeles airport yet (which is always nuts) , and his plane leaves in a hour. I want/need to have him home so badly.

Xanga vs Blogger

I am starting a blog at Xanga. There seems to be a lot of cool stuff you can do with it. It also seems a lot more confusing to. My Xanga blog is here http://www.xanga.com/bostermama

So, we will see. I'll try both for the month and see which one I like better.

If you have a Xanga blog, do you like it? Why?
If you have a blogspot, do you like it? Why?

A couple of days ago, my two year old woke up from a dream frantic. He kept saying, "Mommy the baby is crying, her tummy hurts, she's screaming". I asked him what baby? What does she look like? He told me,"the brown baby mommy, we need to rescue her, we need to take her to the doctor." This went on for hours. Over and over filled with passion and genuine concern he kept saying, "mommy the brown baby is screaming, we need to rescue her, go to the doctor, mommy, her mouth is broke from crying, we have to give her pj's". My son asked him where the baby was and each time Lukas kept pointing east. He was very upset we didn't rescue her. Throughout the last two days he keeps bringing it up. McKayley thought he might be talking about the african-american baby doll we have, so we clothed her, gave her some"food" and gave her to him. He loved on the doll for a while, then said,"mommy when are we going to rescue the brown baby that's screaming.
His dream, the urgency in his voice has definitely left my heart feeling unsettled. In reality there are millions of babies with tummy aches, screaming, needing to go to the doctor, and that need to be "rescued".

Pictures of Thanksgiving

The kids worked hard all morning on decorations. They made a huge welcome home banner for their daddy. I should have taken a picture of it. They put their whole heart it.

I am so happy it was a cold day and we could light a fire. There is something so warm and cozy about a fire.

My true love! He was home for 16 hours and we enjoyed every minute of it.

In the Spirit of Giving- Long but please read

In my adoption quest, I have been blessed to meet and learn about some amazing organizations following God's call and ministering to the people in Africa. There are two in particular that God has laid upon my heart to help in any way I can. When I first had contact with Addy's Hope it was when I found Marion and Emmanuel. I told Hollyann(the heart and soul) of Addy's Hope that if I could help in anyway to please let me know. We did a little promo work for them but more importantly God spearheaded the building of Marion's House(which could not of happened without your prayers and generous outpourings) Thank you all so much.
Just as God led us to Addy's Hope to Glorify him, I feel his leading me to help another organization. I have been impressed by Orphan Children Rescue.
They minister to the people and orphans of Uganda. David and Jamie live in Kampala with their children. They have a wonderful blog at http://orphanchildrenfund.blogspot.com/
I received an email from them yesterday. They are trying to help 100+ people have access to clean water. Here is their email:

Orphan Children Fund Christmas Island Project


Happy Holidays from Uganda. This year for Christmas we have decided to
do a project to help the community of a nearby island. Jamie wrote
about the island briefly in one of her blogs. We can see this island
from our house and David and Jesse have been out to it twice to visit
and see what was happening there. They found the people to be VERY
poor and basically shut off from everyone since they live on an

island and their numbers too small to attract any attention from the NGO's that might be able to help.

There are about 100 adults and 25 children living there. The
live in mud hits with trash as the roofs. (See the pictures on our
blog site www.orphanchildrenfund.blogspot.com ) There are no schools,
stores, doctors or clinics on this island. Because of the poor living
conditions, the mortality rate of children under 5 is unusually high.

They are currently drinking the lake water and disposing all of their
sewage and waste into the lake. You can see from the pictures how
green the water is around the island. What we want to do for them for
Christmas is this: A water purification project so that the entire
island can have clean drinking water, a Christmas dinner with meat,
presents for all of the children and some needed essentials and a bag
of beans and rice for every family. There are a few urgent medical
needs that we would like to take care of as well. I will post the
specifics on the blog. We have already approached them about this and
the entire community is so excited and thankful for the help. They
have never had any organization or individual help them before.

We are asking for donations to help complete this project and
celebration/gifts for these needy people. If you would like to
contribute please send your donations IMMEDIATELY to Orphan Children
Fund 5753 Republic of Texas Austin, TX 78735 for checks and by
credit card or debit card you can go directly to the web site at

www.orphanchildrenfund.org/donate.html.

Please specify on your checks and also when you donate online that it is for the

"Christmas Island Project." We will be posting pictures of the people,
the island and their living conditions as well as their stories that
they are writing for me on our Blog. Please look for them this week at

www.orphanchildrenfund.blogspot.com. Please send any correspondance to info@orphanchildrenfund.org

Happy Holidays,

David, Jamie, Makinzi, Kaci and Jesse McKenzie

Orphan Children Fund US 501c3 EIN# 11-3786751

Ugandan NGO #6112

If you have received this message in error or would like to be taken off of our email list please send a message to info@orphanchildrenfund.org

I know many of you are trying to finance your own adoptions and the upcoming Christmas season right now, but if you would help by committing to lifting these people up in prayer I know God will be able to work miracles.

I would also like to add for every dollar donated, We would feel privileged to match your donation. So, for example:if you or someone you knows gives $50, I will match that $50. Please Email me if you have any questions. And remember no amount is too small. Your .50 cents could be turned into a dollar and do alot in Uganda.

Small print here: I wish I could give thousands to this cause. However due to family budget constraints we will only be able to match up to a total of $1500.

The call of adoption

Now, I know why so few people adopt. 1. You have to be called to it. 2.It is definitely one of the hardest journey's a family can make. 3. It is a complete walk of faith

It is with a heavy heart I share that the kid we have grown to love, who was to move in at Christmas, will not be joining our family. My heart is broken and I have no words to explain all the emotions that are building up inside. I have to trust in God's plan for everyone involved. I have faith just as the death of Marion and Emmanuel's return to his village worked out for God's glory. I also have faith that God's hand will again work in a way to glorify Him.

So, in less than a year, we fell in love with three kids, birthed them in spirit, and had to say, "goodbye". But I don't regret a minute of it. Because; 1. Even through it all, my desire to adopt has grown. 2. God is my strength and I am learning to rely on Him more. 3. My faith has deepened.

A budding Artist

What do think of the new look of my couches?

You can click on the picture if you really want to appreciate the design.

The funny thing is, I really don't care. I know that sounds bad, but let me explain. Every purchase we make for the house is a thought out one. We usually plan. We have never had a credit card. So, everything we have, we save for. I have been married for almost 13 years and just bought my first set of dishes last year (thanks to a generous gift card from my sister-in-law) Thanks Leah. I'm not the type to buy clothes unless they are deeply discounted. Again thanks to Leah, my children had clothes for the first 6 years. She worked at Gap and was constantly blessing our family. We have been mostly broke our whole marriage- the kind of poor that we used to look at each other and say, "do you want mustard w/ your bread or ketchup? Our life has dramatically changed in the last few years, thank you Lord! I think if he would have blessed us with what he has back then, it would have been a disaster. We learned to be grateful, to rely on Him, how to stretch a dollar with kids, ride public transportation, paint house numbers on curbs so we could eat, be content without matching dishes, wear what we found at Salvation Army, eat what we had (which at times was nothing), use cloth diapers(out of necessity), live in a town (Los Angeles) that valued possessions and looks above all else, and still be okay. We gave all we could, we were good stewards of what we had. Today for us is different. I can buy what I need at the grocery store, go out to eat, afford haircuts, buy new dishes, cloth my kids, choose to use disposable diapers if I want, build a skate park in my yard to reach out to kids, etc.... For the most part we are still good stewards of our money. One look at us and most people would never think, "Wow, that couple owns a growing business with 45 employees, pays out over $200,000 in salaries a month." We drive cars that get us from A to B, live in a beautiful but ( modest house considering what other people might choose) dress in deep discounted and yes, sometimes hand me down clothes. Instead most of our money goes to the wonderful people that works for us, (I hope one day to pay them even more) Our ministry we are starting, our church, travel(my passion) and various charities. No, I'm not trying to pat myself on the back. I'm simply stating, God has given us great dreams, not filled with new cars and big houses, it's filled with people. People we love from our office manager, graphic team, photographers, unknown "skate punks", orphans in Africa, foster kids in America, the lady at Walmart that the clerk just told her card was declined, our family, and people that we pray God puts in our path for His purpose. Anyway, back to the couches. They were our first non thought out purchase, we bought them just because we liked them. They cost more than anything else we have bought. From the moment we brought them home, we had buyers remorse, they broke after the first month and now our youngest decided to decorate. It's funny, I know this sounds weird, but the I'm glad they're gone. It's a great reminder of God's control in our life- possessions are nothing, his love is eternal. We knew right after we bought them, it was a mistake.

So if anyone knows how to clean them, I sure would love to give them to a family. I don't want to give them away wrecked. They need to look awesome. I want them to look better than new and be a blessing to a family.

I really hesitated even posting this. Sometimes written words can get lost in translation. I pray you read this as my heart intended. I am not trying to brag. God just laid upon my heart to share. I know with the Christmas season approaching, I am guilty of the busyness of it all. What's the best gift for him/her, decorating, getting things just right. We all have the best intentions, we mean well, we are truly trying to give. But what about our heart? Some Christmas's we simply had "nothing to give" But there was no guilt. No," I wish we could do this or that." We gave of our heart, that was all we had. (grandparents provided everything else). I guess, I'm just trying to remind myself that NOTHING can take the place of God's gift to us. So, if your in a position to do "nothing for people" this year, then DO SOMETHING. If it's volunteering somewhere, giving what you have, or praying for God's peace. And if you have something to give, then give it! If it's money, time or simply your love then give it freely. Nothing truly belongs to us. As we enter this, "holiday season" then I pray may we enter it as servants. Servants for the Lord.

Home again, Home again

We are home! And no, I will not be performing another "doing the dance". After just watching it, I think there will not be another public performance for -THE REST OF MY LIFE!- Sorry to disappoint my fans out there. LOL

We had an amazing time in Los Angeles. But since I've been awake for 36 hours and counting; I will write about it later.

The kids enjoying craft services. (all you can eat snack and drink tables set up on a movie set)

Doing the Dance

I'm doing the dance. It's the dance that comes out when you are just sooooo excited. I think everyone probably has a " doing the dance," dance. It's Adam's goal to find ways to bring out the dance. It's something I have no control over. Sometimes just having McDonald's fries can get the dance going. And there are "dry" dance periods, where nothing can get the "dance" going. A "doing the dance" can not be forced our bribed into motion. There are no certain moves to it either, your body just takes over. My dance is actually a combination of, "crazy white girl meets funky chicken at the disco".

WARNING! Watch this at your own risk! It is extremely embarrassing!

Adam, my love this dance is for you

Entourage

I laughed so hard when Adam told me this, I just gotta share.

Adam said one of the Stand-in's on the film, a sweet Russian man was so thankful to be a part of the film that he brought gifts to the set for Ken and Adam. Apparently, the man asked Adam if he drank. Those of you who know Adam; know he has never drank in his life. Anyway, Adam told him that he didn't. This didn't stop the man from wanting to bestow two bottles of imported Russian vodka to the both of them. Adam again graciously told the man, he really appreciated the gesture, but he doesn't drink. In response the man replied in a thick Russian accent, "no, it is okay, it's for your hotel room, you know for your entourage".

Entourage?
I'm still cracking up.


So now they have two bottles of vodka on their dresser for their "Entourage".

Tears of Joy

Adam called a few minutes ago. He was beyond excited. They started filming today. He sounded like a kid. I loved hearing him try to explain how awesome everything looked. This has been a dream of his since he was a little boy. I guess the reality of him actually being in LA and making a movie hit me. I started to cry and then sob. I hid it from him on the phone, I didn't want to ruin his moment. Years and years of work, prayer and dead ends and never giving up has made my man what he is. My hero! He never tires of doing what is right and following the path God has laid for him. It was the realization of my husband's dream and the triumphant sound in his voice that turned on the tears of joy.

National Adoption Month

A read some heartbreaking info about children all over the world on Jennifer's blog; an inspiring adoptive momma http://www.xanga.com/foringerfamily

November is national Adoption month. Please join me in prayer on behalf of the millions of children needing someone to love and care for them.

Living with a Dreamer

I started looking into flights to Los Angeles for Thanksgiving. Ouch! We were hoping to fly out to visit Adam. He has officially been gone for 4 days. Only 36 or so days to go. The cheapest airfare I found so far is around 500 per person, then multiply by 6 people. It just doesn't make sense to spend that much money for 4 days. Considering he will be preoccupied making a MOVIE! We miss him like crazy! We are so proud of him for following his dreams!

My kind of girl

The tooth wasn't even noticeably loose until last night. McKayley must have worked all night to pull it out.

Big News!

I've spent the last few weeks trying to process all that has happened lately. In January I was browsing the internet looking at all the kids needing homes in foster care. We knew we wanted to adopt from Africa, but also felt led to here in America as well. I came across a picture and a bio of a kid and I couldn't stop looking at it. He was 11 years old, African-American, and desperately wanting a family. When we first thought about adoption, I never imagined an 11 year old boy. So right there, I knew; God must be calling us to this kid. We finally got to meet him in June. After I met him, I got down on my knees and asked the Lord,"Are you sure, I am scared, I don't know him, he's been through a lot, he's 4 days younger than my son, bigger than me, has learning disabilities and could easily overpower any of us." God's answer was simple, Yes! and trust in Me not your fear. So, for the last 5 months we have spent a lot of time with him, full weekends and a long trip to Florida. I knew after the Florida trip, we would know for sure what we would want to do. We had a lot of fun at Disney, but a lot of arguing and fighting amongst the kids. I was tired of mediating silly, pointless fighting. Even with all of that; when it was time to return him to his foster parents, we still felt that same feeling we felt every time he leaves- Wait, don't take him, he belongs here with us!
The big news is:
He will be joining our family at Christmas! Here in Missouri you have to Foster to Adopt. Meaning we have to foster him for six months before we can adopt him. But we already consider him to be a part of our family.

How am I feeling now? Still scared. Still working on trusting God's plan . And finally, I feel grateful. Grateful for all that God has done and continues to do in my life.

New Beginnings

So much has happened in the last few weeks! I don't even know where to start. About a year or so ago, I had a mission. A mission to find my first step mom. When my sister died, God placed a desire upon my heart to track her. She was a major influence in my life between 5-12. There was never any explanation- one day she was there, the next gone. All these years I never forgot her, I never stopped thinking of her. She is an amazing woman. Some of my best childhood memories are being with her. I haven't seen or talked to her for years. It wasn't until years later I understood why she was no longer a part of my life. Anyway, through persistence I got in touch with her. I went on a road trip to Arizona this summer to find her; and it was AMAZING! We had a wonderful time, so wonderful that she came to see us here in Missouri a few weeks ago. She came to meet her grandkids, grandkids she never knew existed until a few months ago! They loved her. Words can not express how blessed we feel to be reconnected to Grandma Jo!
Grandma Jo, if you are reading this, thank you for leaving behind the pain of past experiences to join us today in love and hope for the future. We love you and are excited to have you in our life.

It's 7:30, I got the kids in bed and just finished packing. We leave at 2:00am for Florida! We are taking a foster kid we provide respite for. This is his first time leaving his state, riding on a plane and going to Disney World. We feel very blessed to share this with him. We love this kid a lot.
It's now 8:45 and he just came up to tell us,"I'm trying to fall asleep, it's just too hard, I'm going to Disney World". How cool is that- My heart is melting!

We had our Skate board competition this weekend. It was awesome watching all the kids




Eating pizza on the cop car!

Grandpa Eddie and Bella.


Chris landing a handplant!


Alex- A skater for Untitled Skate boards- He's helping us with our ministry

Jaceman!

How Many Pictures Can a Mom Take of One of Her Kids Eating an Apple?

16 miles

I turned 35 last week. For my birthday, I convinced my husband to ride a bicycle for 16 miles on the Katy trail. It was amazing! We saw 5 snakes, tons of caves, and a beautiful sunset. We rode along the river and ate dinner at a bluff top winery/restaurant. Wow, my buttocks hurt for days.

Moving on

This week started with our last Foster Parent class. Nine long weeks and we are finally deemed acceptable! YaHOOO! Complaining aside, I learned a lot. I am thankful that it is over. It was not fun doing two different homestudies, with two different people at the same time. It was actually quite exhausting and stressful. I was amazed by the bureaucracy of it all. Same form, same info but the state wouldn't use any of the info from our International homestudy. We have been fingerprinted more times than I would have liked, had our children interviewed, medicals, school forms, references, present and past picked through by each agency. Thank you to all of you who had to do multiple references for us. With all that behind us, I am excited to move on.

I really believe a lot of depression comes from focusing on oneself. I have been in a "funk" for a few months. I was focused on My loss, My adoption, My marriage, My kids, My feelings, My stress, My worry. Leah, my sister-in-law sent an amazing email out this week which sums up beautifully where our focus should be. I claimed I was "In His Peace" but was I? No, Did I truly seek him? No. Did I really go to Him for my comfort? No. I turned towards myself, I knelt before my pity, I idolized my suffering. In essence I held on to it all, unwilling to move on.


LEAH'S EMAIL

Phil. 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,
through prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests
to God. AND THE PEACE OF GOD, which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Notice how Paul says that the peace of God will guard our hearts and
minds. He doesn't say that we as humans are capable of guarding our
hearts or protecting our minds from Satin's attacks. Only God's peace
can protect them. I try to guard my heart from people sometimes. I
even try to make myself dwell on God's truth or think about what I
"should be" thinking about when it's hard to. I just realized that
unless I am resting in God's peace, my heart and mind is an open field
for Satan's attak. That's the scariest thing I can imagine.

How do I get God's peace? Two verses come to mind.

2Cr 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my
power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the
more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on
me.

Phl 4:9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or
seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with
you.


I have to accept Christ as enough. If everything around me crumbles,
and I am stripped naked like Job, with no family, full of disease, and
no home, I will still have more than what I deserve because God has
called me His child. My heart being able to feast on God's glory is
all I need. Everything else is extra blessings that I am grateful
for, but Christ is sufficient.

I also realize that I have to breathe & move in all aspects of life in
a way that glorifies Christ and not myself. I must walk in the fruits
of the Spririt and put into practice the way Christ lived. If I do
not, God will not be with me.

I will choose this day to walk in God's peace. I claim the truth that
Jesus Christ will protect my mind and my heart and use them for His
glory and will. God's Word is so powerful. Isn't He good for
opening up His heart and His mind for us to examine and fall in love
with? Let's walk in His peace today and be lights in this dark world.


Sufficient grace,

Leah

JACEMAN

My son, my firstborn, my Jace turned 12 today. I don't even know how to describe how I feel about this kid. Wow, Amazing, Brilliant, Giving, Creative, Strong, Wise, and Godly are some ways to express my love and admiration for him. This kid has overcome and become so much in his life. I can't wait to see what the next twelve years bring.
At four Jace couldn't talk. He was attending a severe needs special education school. We were thrilled when he learned how to sign for juice when he was 4. I remember the struggle I had as a mom, wondering what did I do? What can I do? My heart yearned to hear, "mommy" He was 4 going on 5. Still no words. Silent, but listening. I remember those words, those piercing words that came from his teacher,"Steffany, I really think something is seriously wrong, I've been noticing some behaviors, mannerisms, I think it's time. He needs to see a neurologist and I don't think he will ever be able to be mainstreamed(normal school)." A deafening scream pierced my soul, "NO". My motherly instinct took over. It told me they were wrong, everyone was wrong!
I started researching, reading and praying! I noticed his eyes, they weren't right- I took him without insurance, without knowing where I was going to come up with the $ to the best place I could find. I took him to a well known place in LA, an eye institute. After all those years, no one ever thought to test his eyes. It made sense, language comes from labeling or identifying seen things. My baby couldn't see, his world was distorted. I said, "look Jace a cat" he saw a blob. A blurry blob that looked liked everything else. That's why he showed severe autistic behaviors.
Nothing was safe to him, except mommy and daddy. When the Doc. showed me how my baby saw the world I cried. How did I not know this? After he got his incredibly thick glasses a few weeks later- The world forever changed for this kid. We have a video of his first sight- It's a tear jerker as you watch him "see" for the first time. The way he looked at us, his toys and Star Wars.
Well, now he talks all the time, he tells us he has to make up for lost time! Just a few highlights:

• By six, he had already created his first Trading card game, Green Force- complete with rules, and design. We "produced them".

• By seven, he created his first comic that was produced"Cop Boy" And was reading novels like Harry Potter and How To win Friends and Influence People.

• At nine, he asked me, "mom, has anyone ever read the bible from front to back?"

• By ten he had his second comic produced and sold it specifically to raise money for a kid dying with cancer. He wanted the kid to go to Disneyland. Oh, yeah he finished the old Testament. He also made life changes due to what he read in the bible. He threw away his Harry Potter books. Jace: Mom, God showed me last night that witchcraft is wrong, I want to get rid of these books. Mom: Gee Jace, I like Harry Potter, should I give it up? Jace: Mom, you make your own choice, but for me, I need to do this.

• By eleven, he read the bible from front to back and stated his next goal was to do it again. "I know the Lord will show me even more." He also told me he prayed and the lord told him we are to adopt from Liberia.

And now he's 12! Even with all that said, he is still a typical kid, with typical challenges and I love him! Look what God has done! Jace's short life reminds me to, focus on the goal, don't believe what "the experts say", stay true to your heart, and to follow God.
Please help me celebrate and wish him a happy birthday.
With that- HAPPY BIRTHDAY JACE! WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!