Monday, October 29, 2007
I've spent the last few weeks trying to process all that has happened lately. In January I was browsing the internet looking at all the kids needing homes in foster care. We knew we wanted to adopt from Africa, but also felt led to here in America as well. I came across a picture and a bio of a kid and I couldn't stop looking at it. He was 11 years old, African-American, and desperately wanting a family. When we first thought about adoption, I never imagined an 11 year old boy. So right there, I knew; God must be calling us to this kid. We finally got to meet him in June. After I met him, I got down on my knees and asked the Lord,"Are you sure, I am scared, I don't know him, he's been through a lot, he's 4 days younger than my son, bigger than me, has learning disabilities and could easily overpower any of us." God's answer was simple, Yes! and trust in Me not your fear. So, for the last 5 months we have spent a lot of time with him, full weekends and a long trip to Florida. I knew after the Florida trip, we would know for sure what we would want to do. We had a lot of fun at Disney, but a lot of arguing and fighting amongst the kids. I was tired of mediating silly, pointless fighting. Even with all of that; when it was time to return him to his foster parents, we still felt that same feeling we felt every time he leaves- Wait, don't take him, he belongs here with us!
The big news is:
He will be joining our family at Christmas! Here in Missouri you have to Foster to Adopt. Meaning we have to foster him for six months before we can adopt him. But we already consider him to be a part of our family.
How am I feeling now? Still scared. Still working on trusting God's plan . And finally, I feel grateful. Grateful for all that God has done and continues to do in my life.