Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Toothpaste and Marriage

I had no idea that toothpaste was a part of a marriage. Or more accurately whether you squeeze from the middle of the tube or from the end of the tube was a part of marriage. I normally here a, "humpf" noise in the bathroom every morning. I have been happily unaware for 15 years that the "humpf" noise was my husband verbalizing his displeasure using an indistinguishable guttural sound from deep within. Why has Adam made such a noise every morning for 15 years you might ask....

because I am a middle squeezer and I always lose the cap or better yet I find no point in putting it back on. So while I am perfectly happy in my own little squeeze my toothpaste from the middle world, my husband is not. Who knew? So how do we plan on solving this predicament.
Me loving the toothpaste the way it is and my husband yearning for order by wanting the toothpaste squeezed from the end? I promise to roll up the toothpaste when I am finished and he promised to squeeze it from the middle when he is finished. Thus making both parties blissfully content. I can continue to enjoy my toothpaste squeezed from the middle completely unaware(by choice)of how gross this may seem to people and my dear husband can feel some sort of order in this chaotic life we live and continue to be completely unaware(by choice)of how freeing it is to squeeze a tube of toothpaste from the middle.
And there you have it...another potentially devastating marital crisis diverted by compromise.

7 comments:

Nadia said...

just buy a second tube of toothpaste!! lol

Sean and Lisa said...

Funny! Actually, Sean and I taught a marriage class and you wouldn't believe how many times the toothpaste issue came up!Seriously! We started carrying toothpaste and toilet paper (cuz that's another BIG issue for couples! LOL!)to be ice breakers in our new classes and boy did it work!!LOL!
I'm a middle squeezer myself so I get you girl!LOL!
So glad you came to a compromise and another marital crisis was diverted! :)
Much love!

Cassie said...

paul and i each have our own tube in our own drawer. we couldn't compromise...

Beautiful Mess said...

Glad to see I am not alone!

amy smith said...

i am with nadia and cassie... who needs to compromise?

Dani said...

We are so alike on this issue!:)

However, our dentist gave us this cute little invention that rolls the tube for you. It clicks on the end of the tube and has a latch of some sort that rolls the tube. So I can squeeze from the middle, and hubby can roll it with no problem come his turn:)

D.

Becky said...

You are too funny!