Saturday, July 19, 2008

Inadequate

I have so much to do. Yet, I feel like I'm standing still, lost and inadequate. I don't regret for one moment our decision to bring Gadese here(the pregnant Ethiopian woman). She has blessed our family beyond words. I just feel like God called me to something that is so beyond my gifting it is scary. When we met her and Alex in Ethiopia we thought things would go differently than they have. We being completely naive thought that Alex would already be granted a visa, would be working for our company, would be on our company medical insurance, and he and Gadese would be anxiously awaiting their baby together, here in America. Instead we are no closer to a Visa for Alex and Gadese's is going to expire 3 weeks before the baby is born. Alex is unemployed in Ethiopia. Since Gadese is here on a tourist Visa, we can't get her state help for medical expenses and forget company insurance she isn't allowed to "work". Her and Alex have now been apart for over three months with no end in sight. The baby is due in less than three months. The medical bills are piling up. I need to start fund raising to cover her medical care. The doctor said if everything goes great we are looking at 20K if she has complications possibly 100-250k. Okay that shakes me a little. So next week I need to start, 1. Fundraising 2. Go to the three hospitals in town and see if any of them will help. 3. Since things are going well, go to the birthing center and talk to the midwifes about helping. 4. apply to extend Gadese's Visa and send in $300 with the application. 5. Forget trying to get Alex a permanent Visa and apply for a tourist one so at least he can be here for the birth. This will also take money for the Application and 2k for airfare.
We also at this time completely support Gadese and her family financially on our own.
Like I said, I wouldn't change any of it. She has become my sister and my best friend. I just feel so inadequate. And to be honest this is just one of the areas of my life right now that I feel this way.

9 comments:

Candace said...

Oh Steffany! I can't even begin to imagine. This has been quite the year for all of you with so many twists and turns. I wish I had something great to say, but I will tell you...I am praying for you, for all of you. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of you and wonder what is going on up there. Keep praying, God will carry you and your family through.
Lots of love and blessings!

Emily said...

Maybe you can get a doctor or hospital to volunteer their services? Remember we are ALL inadequate, but when we are walking in obidience to God's call then we are under His protection.

From
The most inadequate walker of God who is still upright ;)

crispy said...

I love the quote...

"things will clarify as we get near".


May that be the case with you and the unsure situation. Praying my friend. We get just enough light to take the step right in front of us...not the one 3 months down the road.

amy smith said...

praying for you and all your situations. god doesn't use perfect people. only ones who are willing. you WILL be blessed, and in the meantime, you are completely blessing others who aren't even a part of all you are doing. saying i am proud of you falls short.

Wife to the Rockstar said...

God sees all of it. He really does. That is why being inedequate is so very beautiful. Because then he gets to be adequate in all of our circumstances.

Holy Chaos said...

when you are weak- He is strong.

Jesus loves you. : )

Cassie said...

Steffany,
I am amazed by your obedience and desire to be Jesus hands and feet. I think you should add a donate button to your blog!
Thinking about you and praying...

emily said...

Once again, your decision to walk by faith, encourages me! Trusting with you that the Lord will work all things for your good and His glory. :)

Anonymous said...

Spinningbabies.com has a few techniques to get baby into the correct position for birth. It saved me when I did home birth with Gwen.

By the way, when is Gadese due? I'm due late October!

Love,
April
thecoolfairymaker@gmail.com