I Really Wish

I could staple my mouth shut.



Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Eph. 4:31).

Yeah, It's Going to Be Hard

to say goodbye.

Not Today

It turns out Alex was out of town trying to make money. We got a hold of him on Saturday. We now know his birthday! We went to the passport office this morning with our hopes up and heads held high. But today was not the day. Apparently we need the original motorized form from Ethiopia that Alex had signed. Thank God I know someone in Ethiopia right now on a mission trip. She will bring the original form back with her. Thank you Erica. If you get a chance stop by her blog and give her some love.

Race Against the Clock

What a crazy week or so. The ticker keeps ticking. Only 7 days before Gedese is legally suppose to leave, in reality a totally different story. Where did I leave off last time in this continuing drama that is my life?! Oh yeah, the government sent a letter after 4 MONTHS!!!!!! that they denied her visa extension and she has to leave within 30 days.

Well....

We went almost two weeks ago to try to get a passport for the baby...only to be told that dad(who is in Africa) needs to be there or have notarized a statement giving his permission for Christiana to apply for a passport. I explained dad lives in AFRICA! Apparently that doesn't count. He needs to be dead to be exempt. After a week I got Alex to go to the the embassy in Ethiopia get the paper signed and notarized, only to be turned down again because I don't have his birth date! Again I explained he was born in Africa and his birth date is probably after the second full moon following the harvest. I asked if I could make one up told I would go to jail. Then I called our senator to be told there's nothing they could do. Tried to call Alex to get legal birth date (no Gedese doesn't know it and that is another story) Alex then goes missing. We have tried for over a week, finally got a hold of family today after Gedese has been up 4 nights worrying that he is out of town possibly working. We now know he is not dead (insert sigh here) and now are waiting for his return to Addis. We called his mom who does not know his birth date either.(Don't ask) I have since then, thanks to Jenny (my girl! I love her, we traveled to Ethiopia to pick up our kids together, she also paid for Gedese's airplane ticket) have contacted an immigration attorney who can't help our situation, but at least provided insight. So what's now? We wait it out! Hope Alex shows up. Pray Gedese doesn't get deported and oh yeah, PRAY!

Gee, Thanks....I Guess.

As I was leaving the gym this morning, I was stopped by a lady at the front desk.

Lady: Can I tell you something? I mean this in the best way...but you're a freak of nature.
Me: That's a new one. Gee, Thanks. I guess.

She went on to explain herself. It actually was a compliment.

So there you have it. I'm a freak of nature.

CAUGHT!

In the act of brotherly love and war

I don't really care about who was sitting on who as much as the fact they were actually playing together!!!!! This is the first time they have really acted like brothers. Wahoooo!

Things I'll Miss Later in Life but....Drive me Nuts Now!

Sneaking off to the bathroom alone to do my business only ending up entertaining three toddlers at the same time.

Toys all over the house.

Taking an hour to clean all my windows and mirrors only to turn around and see little handprints all over them again.

Hearing "mom, mom, mom" over and over again.

Wondering where all the toilet paper went.

Reading Brown Bear Brown Bear over and over again.

The Wonder Pets.

The never ending quest searching for favorite blankets and luvies before bedtime.

Cleaning up the flood during bath time.

I know these days will be gone before I know it. I know there will be a time that instead of craving, "me time" to undo the bags under my eyes, I will be craving, "kid time" and the bags under my eyes will no longer matter ( because gravity will have won by that time anyway:)

I Love This Girl!

I love this girl!

It was Faith's 8th birthday today. She is my can-do girl. She is the official battery changer, critter catcher, toy fixer of the house who happens to love to wear pretty dresses. She has such a beautiful personality. Her enthusiasm and excitement for the simplest things (like candy:) is contagious.

We celebrated with grandparents at Chuck E Cheese.

Grandpa Coop and Xia

Diezel trying to sneak left over cake.

Faith and McKayley with her birthday present.

The crew. Sunday night is a great time to go to Chuckie's. We were 13 of the 20 people there.

Jace being the coolest 13 year old boy around dancing in front of the blue screen with Faith.

Flashback Friday

This is the first time I did a flashback Friday. I had so much fun digging through old pictures. I found pics from my circus days (another post all together), pics that at the time I felt,"old", but look at them now I see a little girl, pics from another life time. I haven't looked at these for years.
This Friday's theme is-

My Three Weddings!

Yes, I have been married THREE times! (To the same amazing man)

First wedding-We eloped. We got married in Las Vegas at the Little White Wedding Chapel. In hind sight I do NOT recommend this option. We were two little scared kids. Adam made a vow to stay pure before marriage and lets just say Vegas was our scape goat.
9months later Jace was born.



Second wedding was our originally planned first wedding. It happened 4 months after our Vegas wedding and yes I was beginning to show. It was a Renaissance Wedding. It was amazing! It was a potluck in the middle of a field. Cost us nothing. I was teaching at that time and all my kids were the wedding party. I also had a best man and maid of honor. Except for the fact I had just lost Jace's twin in utero and was basically ordered to bed rest-it was perfect. Unfortunately most of our family decided not to come. During our ceremony two hawks/eagles were circling over our heads.




Third wedding I was 7 months pregnant with McKayley. We wanted to finally get married under God and with our church family. It was so beautiful and again free! We had any members of church that wanted to renew their vows stand up with us. There was a couple that had many married for over 40 years renew that day. Our pastor and his family were some of our best friends and that made it so special to us.



Yes, I have been married three times. Each time it felt like the first time. I really pray God continues to put those two words in my heart every day,"I DO." But then again like everything it's a choice. A choice I freely make each and everyday. I choice I fight tooth and nail for....to be married to the most amazing man ever.

Another one

After helping Xia go potty-

Jace: There are three things I fear, parasites, centipedes and poop.

Toddler Revelations Today

6:00am- I hear clankity clank. After getting out of bed I see Princess Xia. She is dressed in full princess attire including plastic high heels and is dancing around having a grand time.

me: Xia(2), what are you doing? Everyone is asleep.
Xia: I a princess momma.
me: Well.. princesses are not allowed out of bed until 8:00am
Xia: Oh.
----------------------------

Driving in car-

Lukas(3): Mom when are Diezel and and Xia leaving?
Me: Leaving? umm..never.
Lukas: Oh.

------------------------------

While painting with water colors. The toddlers each had their own set of paints. Diezel kept taking Lukas and Xia's paint.

Diezel: MINE!
Me: Diezel everyone has their own.
Diezel: Oh

Thursday Thoughts

It is not my circumstances that vexes me as much as the depth of my faith.
For, if I truly believed God works everything out for His perfect glory then no amount of strife or turmoil should trouble me.

No matter what today holds or what tomorrow's challenges bring,
My heart should be at peace when my spirit is filled with faith.

It does not matter the size of my conflict as much as the size of my faith.

Lack of faith magnifies all. My problem maybe the size of an ant, but without faith it appears to be a mountain.

On the other hand when my faith is strong and I my problem is the size of a mountain, I just keep walking and take little notice of it and only see the path God has laid before me.

No Words

With so much being thrown my way, I am left without words to blog. I have faith that the tidal wave of challenges will go back to sea soon. Maybe then my words will find their way back to blogland, and maybe there will still be people around actually reading.

Until then....
Steffany

Peace and Blessing in the Eye of a Storm

As I look back at my posts lately, it's easy to recognize a common thread. Struggle. Yes, the last year or so has not been without hardship, stress and struggle. Even though I feel and appear to be constantly in the eye of the storm, I am at peace. I cannot help but to look around at the blessings that continue to flow in and around my life. I am truly happier than I have ever been..

Philippians 2:13
For it is God who is at work within you, giving you the will and the power to achieve his purpose.

Galatians 6:9
We must never get tired of doing good because if we don’t give up the struggle, we shall get our harvest at the proper time.

1 Peter 4:12-13
Dear friends, don't be bewildered or surprised when you go through the fiery trials ahead, for this is no strange, unusual thing that this is going to happen to you. Instead, be really glad--because these trials will make you partners with Christ in his wonderful joy of sharing his glory in that coming day when it will be displayed.

So when you think of me and how I am doing, you will know the truth- As for me and my house we are dancing while serving the Lord:)


Blessings!
Steffany

DENIED

Gedese's application to extend Visa until March has been denied! We applied months ago and just now found out she has to leave within 30 days or face deportation.

Please pray it all comes together! We still need a passport and visa for Christiana!

Sorry for the non-update. Christiana is home. She is doing much better. Thank God she was here! She went through a battery of tests. Everything from a spinal to nose swabs. After 3 days it was determined she had a really bad cold. Her pulse oxygen dropped to %60, thus requiring oxygen.

Christmas Eve at the Hospital

I just got home from the hospital. Christiana was admitted tonight on Christmas Eve. I have no idea how long she will have to stay there. Please uplift them in your prayer and thought.

Walking a Fine Line

This Christmas more than any other I am completely aware of the fine line between consumerism and blessing those you love. Sometimes ignorance is indeed bliss. Not only do I have my recent trip to Africa and your stories and blogs to remind me of what our true priorities should be, I also have a daily glimpse of the realities of this world when I look not only in the twins eyes but also those of Gedese and Christiana. Every day when I struggle with the selfish desires of my heart, I see 9 people that I love beyond words. When their demands are greater than my ability at the moment and can't help but to think about what the demands of the twins parents are like at the same moment, or the demands of Gedese's family. I am again humbled and ask God for strength and thank Him for giving me perspective.
Having Gedese and the twins here are like having a built in consumermeter. Do I really need a box of macaroni? Wouldn't it be more cost effective to make my own? Should I pitch the shirt with stains? Or wouldn't be better to maybe dye it? Do my kids really need more clothes? Isn't 4 pair of pants per kid enough? Do their clothes really need to be washed after wearing it once? I think just by having them here I have saved thousands on needless purchases. The thing is- I'm not really a shopper. We spent the greater part of our marriage without much-and now that we have I could do without. I really think starting our marriage and family out doing without was the biggest blessing. Sorry a little side tracked. Okay, but here's the thing. I love to give. I really do. I love to find needs and fill them. I would rather go without shoes if it meant I could give them to someone. (Lest you think I'm a saint- I should mention my desire to give is selfishly motivated-It makes me feel sooooo good! I love it!)
Sometimes the consumermeter that Gedese provides irritates me though. Like for Christmas.
I know my kids could live without gifts but again I love to give. So there is my quandary, the fine line between consumerism and blessing. I thought I did a pretty good job at this. My kids get three presents. One from us, one from the boys and one from the girls. However when Gedese heard this- I got a deep sigh followed by a tsk tsk and a never in Ethiopia talk. We have a lot of these. Then I started to think- Maybe I have crossed that line. My desire to bless really has become the transcending into consumerism at Christmas. I know people who don't gift at Christmas. I admire that, I really do, but my nature is to give. So here I am again walking that fine line.


BTW- thanks for all the prayers- I am feeling better. I'm on some crazy antibiotics. Diezel is a trooper. Other than his noisy breathing, you wouldn't even know he's sick. Xia on the other hand-Wow! night after night up crying. High fevers, cough, and throwing up. Christiana is holding strong. We continue to suction her out before every feeding and check her temp. She is at 99.8. So we get to stay at home.

If I don't post again before Christmas-
Merry Christmas! May the Lord's blessing pour upon you and your family.
Thank you God!!!!!! For sending your Son to die for me.

Uncle!

Up all night doing breathing treatments on Diezel and caring for Xia(who is now sick). I had to go to urgent care this morning. I am peeing blood. Waiting for test results.

and

I still need to go Christmas shopping.

Still Here.

Online is down again.
using hubby's laptop.
Diezel has pneumonia again. Pretty bad. Around the clock breathing treatments. He's still at home with us (no hospital). Christiana is getting sick as well. Praying to make it through tonight without any ER visits.
I slept most of the day so I could take the night shift to watch over Diezel and Christiana.

It Just Feels Right....

I wore Xia on my bag (African Style) tonight for the first time in 6 months. She melted on to me. I could almost sense her little body and spirit thinking, "It just feels like home."

* Note to self*
Never stop doing the little things that make my children"feel just right"

Holy Cow!

Just found out Tyson Griffin is also coming to the premier tomorrow night! It's going to be a great time!

Changed mind

I changed my mind-I was wanting the new blog to be a "safe" place for people to share experiences and ideas. However I also want it to be tool everyone can use. If there are links to organizations, fundraisers for adoptions and needs that need to be met please let me know so I can add them. Just comment on the new blog! I'm really excited to see what God is going to do.

So here it it: Remember it's pretty empty, just got started yesterday.

Meet Needs Today

New Blog

I created a new/second blog for the sole purpose of having a place to share my passions. Mainly for Africa, but hey, show me a need somewhere else and I'm there(at least on my knees). I realize that some people come here to my blog to check up on our family and how the kids are doing. Which is awesome! There are others who maybe visit looking for something different- a cause to rally around, a need that needs prayer, a mission that needs funding or just plain ideas on how to be proactive in doing something. I decided to separate my blogs in this manner. On this blog you will continue to read about our lives and our adventures. You'll get to see the dance, zits on my face, cute pictures of my kids, my thoughts on life, raising 6 kids and chasing after that quest to live happily ever after.
On my new blog you'll get to read about my organizations, candid reviews of agencies, ways to raise money, swap ideas about fundraising, causes that keep me awake at night, my victories and failures as I try to meet needs today! I will often have links to other sites, donate buttons and info. I will promise to do the best research I can to find trustworthy and credible causes and organizations to support. I welcome ideas and direction as I start this new endeavor. I hope it will be a resource for everyone. Due to the fact that we will be talking candidly about many things this blog will be private for a while. Please leave a comment on this blog or email me if you would like to have access to the new blog.

Candid - Real Candid

For you my dear Wife to the Rockstar blogging friend:



The assignment:

Take a picture of yourself right NOW!

DON’T change your clothes, DON’T fix your hair… Just take a picture.

Post that picture with NO editing.

Post these instructions with your picture.







Well, you can't get anymore candid than that. I sure wish I wasn't so zoomed in though. Me in all my glory.


I think the meds are wreaking havoc on me. I am breaking out like a teenager. Wouldn't be so bad, except just found out last week that we are having a huge red carpet event here in our home town to premiere our movie. Any advice on how to clear up skin quickly?

The premiere is on Tuesday- If you live in Missouri, please come!!!!!! It's only on Tuesday. We are honored to have three great fighters that are in the movie come to Tuesday's event . Ernie Reyes Jr., Gray Maynard, and JermaineAndre .

The whole family will walk the Red carpet this time-Even Gedese and Christiana!!!!!

Racing

My mind is racing,
I can't sleep,
thoughts, ideas, plans
Another sleepless night thinking about Africa.

Valiant Attempt

Here's my attempt at newborn photography. Good thing Christiana is sooooooo adorable.

More Pics.

I Was Sorta Brave

I somewhat survived my dentist appointment on Monday. I've been a haze the past few days. Combination of pain, swelling, meds and then the side effects of meds. Yes, I did end up taking half a Valium before my appointment. I actually took half the night before because I kept crying every time I thought about dentist. I know, I know, It's beyond ridiculous. I think going to the dentist is my weakness.
I'm so glad I took the Valium. I mentioned to the dentist that I usually vomit for days after sedation. ( I was okay with this. He however was not) He decided to only numb my mouth instead.
I would not have been able to make through if I wasn't relaxed from the Valium. By the time he was done(over 2 hours) I was feeling the pain.
After taking some pain medication, I pretty much got to stay in bed most of the day. IT ROCKED!!!!!! Never happens.
Everything was fine until last night I started having a reaction to the antibiotic. I started freaking out that it was going to be like before(see here). Now they put me on something that I never heard of that comes with huge warning labels. I will probably go back in tomorrow because something is not right. My gums are turning grey/white at the implant site. The pain is also increasing. (Insert poor me violin music here)

Calling ALL Bloggers

I really want to start a blog list again. I miss reading everyone's blogs. The problem is I have to hunt through old blog posts to find you. If I visit your blog or have ever left a comment will you please let me know by leaving me a comment so I can create a new blog list. It would mean so much to me and save me tons of time finding you. Even if I haven't left a comment on your blog for a long time, I still want to find you. I miss you all. Even if you think I already have your link, please leave a comment, it will make my life soooo much easier:)

And if you've read my blog for any length of time, you all know I need help.

Thanks,
Steffany